Because I think it's good to reflect on what's good...

Highlights of this year in the ever-lovely Riverside...

• Read books I should have as an English major, but never did. "Old Man in the Sea," "Catcher in the Rye," "Great Gatsby." Being the fan of American Literature that I am, I read them like candy, wondering how I'd ever gotten along without them. And I was able to read them with Aunt Margie, which made it all the better. Hearing her insights made me wish she was teaching a class I could attend.  
• I learned to crank out an awesome lesson plan in a very short amount of time. Content standard, learning objective, instructional strategy, rationale, assessment and all. Wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am. 
• Bit the bullet and applied to grad schools. Not fun, but it's done. Getting that first acceptance letter was one of the best feelings ever. 
• Had a weekly "Grey's Anatomy" date with my 4th sister, who helped me miss my own sisters a lot less. 
• Enjoyed the sunshine. Put my feet in the fountains outside my apartment building (not sure if that's allowed).  I'll miss the sun next year-- how many days a year does it rain in England? 
• Made new friends. All by myself. I guess I'm a big girl now.
• One of the students from the class I TAed for told me (after I'd spent hours working with him on his papers), "I get it now. I will never love to write, and I'll never be a writer. But I can understand the enjoyment that comes from a carefully-crafted piece of work. Thank you." 
• Hanging out with 2-year-old Logan in the office, who became my friend when I gave him a yellow balloon (which matched his yellow boots) to tie around his wrist. He wore it around campus all afternoon.
• Driving back out to Biola and staying at Dr. Kleist's house until past midnight with Cami and Brenna, discussing and debating the philosophy of education in America and drinking cinnamon coffee. 
• Looking at wedding blogs with Jenn and Gail during work. I'm eternally thankful to them for introducing me to Pinterest (or really, eternally non-grateful-- I wasted so much time on it). 
• Friday afternoons at Disneyland. We were on a Storm Trooper hunt. 
• Decorating for Caleb and Ashley's surprise engagement party. You can't go wrong with flowers and candles. That's a rule of life. 
• Played "Just Dance" with Aub, which only confirmed the fact that I cannot dance. At all. But I sure try. 
• Watched way too many episodes of Bones. I think blood and guts are fascinating...what does that say about me?
• Authentic chinese food with Nate & Sam
• Wrote my first Haiku poem
• Cooked elaborate, wonderful meals, just for myself, using up almost every pan and dish and dirtying up the whole kitchen. At least it didn't smell up the hall (our hall always smells like a combination of dirty feet and greasy Korean food... won't miss that). 
• Staying way too late at Mindy and Tim's place, talking about the mysteries & intricacies of life
• Drinking Mike's Hard Lemonade with straws on a mattress on the floor in my old room at Lizzie's, which is now filled with boxes as she gets ready to be married.
• Tutored for sweet Paola. She turned 14 halfway into tutoring, and now she gets to wear make up. She chose a bright pink lip color and teal eyeliner. She loves vampires and wants to go to UCLA to be a doctor. She is going to live in New York, Paris and China. From her big dreams, you'd never know what's she's already had to overcome. We made button bracelets and played Scrabble (she trounced me) and cards. We sat in the hammock and read quietly together from our books (yes, she's a kindred spirit), and then she told me all about the story (the book she's reading is about girls switched at birth). When she gets excited, she barely takes a breath, and I completely lose track of the story she's telling me. But her brown eyes get so big and sparkly; I think she's spunky and smart and beautiful. 

The patio, strung with twinkle lights, was crowded. She wore a navy dress, with raspberry lipstick that matched the ribbon in her curls. She carried the soda bottle gingerly, the condensation dripped unevenly onto the hot pavement. She scanned across the heads of people -- the couple fighting in hushed tones by the water, the woman starting her third mojito, the chatting trios of girlfriends in clinging dresses.  The sun had not quite dipped behind the city skyline, and the evening hummed with the energy of dozens of people waiting for a table.

"Lyla, party of 2," the hostess announced from her booth, in a thin voice that could not have carried past the outdoor bar.

Another frantic glance across the patio. She squinted against the spangled reflection of the sun setting in the water, looking one last time for Sarah before heading up to claim their table. The crowd parted slightly to make way for a cocktail waiter with a tray of shrimp.

And then, there he was. Standing still against the rail, looking directly at her with that gaze that always managed to be so direct, but so veiled.

In that look was the impact of thickly layered memories. There was a tingle of arms brushing shyly, walking side-by-side down a crowded walkway. There was a sigh of relief, a tightening of muscles at her touch as she nestled her head under his chin, into the curve of his shoulder. There was the lingering intimacy of millions of shared minutes. In those lips was caught a gentle kiss, soft and sure as sunshine.

Her breath jumped in a curt, painful twist through her stomach; she blinked to see if it was really him.

Across the tangle of lights, he was gone.

Wide fields of lavender

Deep skies of gray

Soft, feather pillows

Sunshine in May

Tall cups of tea

Blue lakes of mist

Handful of tulips

Sweet, trusting kiss

Skyline of trees

Striped socks of wool

Lit-up fireplace

Sailboat in a lull

Hushed snowflakes

Laundry on a line

Light, low laughter
Hands full of mine

Slowly a journey
To feeling of worth

Being close to heaven
Here on earth

From "The Blue Castle"... Just Because

They ate out on the verandah that almost overhung the lake. Before them lay Mistawis, like a scene out of some fairy tale of old time. And Barney smiling his twisted, enigmatical smile at her across the table.
"What a view old Tom picked out when he built this shack!" Barney would say exultantly.
Supper was the meal Valancy liked best. The faint laughter of winds was always about them and the colours of Mistawis, imperial and spiritual, under the changing clouds were something that cannot be expressed in mere words. Shadows, too. Clustering in the pines until a wind shook them out and pursued them over Mistawis. They lay all day along the shores, threaded by ferns and wild blossoms. They stole around the headlands in the glow of the sunset, until twilight wove them all into one great web of dusk.
The cats, with their wise, innocent little faces, would sit on the verandah railing and eat the tidbits Barney flung them. And how good everything tasted! Valancy, amid all the romance of Mistawis, never forgot that men had stomachs. Barney paid her no end of compliments on her cooking.
"After all," he admitted, "there's something to be said for square meals. I've mostly got along by boiling two or three dozen eggs hard at once and eating a few when I got hungry, with a slice of bacon once in a while and a jorum or tea."
Valancy poured tea out of Barney's little battered old pewter teapot of incredible age. She had not even a set of dishes--only Barney's mismatched chipped bits--and a dear, big, pobby old jug of robin's-egg blue.
After the meal was over they would sit there and talk for hours--or sit and say nothing, in all the languages of the world, Barney pulling away at his pipe, Valancy dreaming idly and deliciously, gazing at the far-off hills beyond Mistawis where the spires of firs came out against the sunset. The moonlight would begin to silver the Mistawis. Bats would begin to swoop darkly against the pale, western gold. The little waterfall that came down on the high bank not far away would, by some whim of the wildwood gods, begin to look like a wonderful white woman beckoning through the spicy, fragrant evergreens. How sweet it was to sit there and do nothing in the beautiful silence, with Barney at the other side of the table, smoking.

“It is what you read when you don't have to that determines what you will be when you can't help it.” -Oscar Wilde.

Personality Assessment

I recently took the Myer's Briggs Personality test. My result: INFP. These letters stand for: Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling, Perceptive. This is the assessment of my personality... it was kind of scary how right on it was, so I wanted to save it:

"INFPs present a calm, pleasant face to the world. They appear to be tranquil and peaceful to others, with simple desires. The INFP internally feels his or her life intensely. In the relationship arena, this causes them to have a very deep capacity for love and caring which is not frequently found with such intensity in the other types. The INFP does not devote their intense feelings towards just anyone, and are relatively reserved about expressing their inner-most feelings. They reserve their deepest love and caring for a select few who are closest to them. INFPs are generally laid-back, supportive and nurturing in their close relationships. INFPs are usually adaptable and congenial, unless one of their ruling principles has been violated, in which case they stop adapting and become staunch defenders of their values.  With Introverted Feeling dominating their personality, they're very sensitive and in-tune with people's feelings, and feel genuine concern and caring for others. Slow to trust others and cautious in the beginning of a relationship, an INFP will be fiercely loyal once they are committed. With their strong inner core of values, they are intense individuals who value depth and authenticity in their relationships, and hold those who understand and accept their perspectives in especially high regard.

INFP Strengths:

• Warmly concerned and caring towards others
• Sensitive and perceptive about what others are feeling
• Loyal and committed - they want lifelong relationships
• Deep capacity for love and caring
• Driven to meet other's needs
• Strive for "win-win" situations
• Nurturing, supportive and encouraging
• Likely to recognize and appreciate other's need for space
• Able to express themselves well
• Flexible and diverse

INFP Weaknesses

• May tend to be shy and reserved
• Don't like to have their "space" invaded
• Extreme dislike of conflict
• Extreme dislike of criticism
• Strong need to receive praise and positive affirmation
• May react very emotionally to stressful situations
• Have difficulty leaving a bad relationship
• Have difficulty scolding or punishing others
• Tend to be reserved about expressing their feelings
• Perfectionistic tendancies may cause them to not give themselves enough credit
• Tendency to blame themselves for problems, and hold everything on their own shoulders

http://www.personalitypage.com/html/INFP_rel.html

Aub's Life Motto

“I meant what I said and I said what I meant. An elephant's faithful one-hundred percent!” -Horton Hatches the Egg